Pregnancy Isn't Contagious, Right?

I'm in my mid-twenties now (almost), so I guess it shouldn't be surprising that all around me people are getting married and having babies. I have no problem with this; weddings mean wearing a pretty dress and getting drunk and eating cake celebrating with friends. The first of my childhood friends is getting married this summer and I'm incredibly happy for her. But goddamn it's going to be weird to watch her walk down the aisle. Another, more recently made friend is also getting married this summer, and it's also going to be a bit strange, but far less so to watch her exchange vows (also, insanely happy for them).

Each year my soccer team loses players as their eggos turn to preggo. And it's wonderful; the babies that result are adorable, and I genuinely enjoy being around them. We had dinner with friends of ours and met their three-month old daughter for the first time (OMG CUTE). When we go home this summer, we'll see my pretend nephew (as in, he's Tom's nephew, not that he doesn't exist), who will be nearly two years old – we haven't seen him since he was about five months old. When we go back in December, I'll hopefully get to meet my very first cousinlet/cousinlette (my cousin's first baby).

On Mother's Day, Tom and I went for our standing brunch date and the restaurant was handing out carnations to the moms. While I was paying, the manager asked if I was a mom yet – a legitimate question since she needed to know if I should get a flower or not. After saying no, she leaned in and asked "Do you plan to be a mother someday?".

Um, sheesh lady, I'm trying to do math and work out a tip, isn't it a bit early to be asking me lifestyle questions like that?! While we do see you once a week for bacon and eggs, I'm not sure my own MOTHER has asked me that!

This isn't to say that I'm feeling like everyone is getting married and procreating but me; rather, it's more like I hope we still have common ground and that our friendships don't change (too much) with these major life events. Let me put it this way. When someone tells me they are pregnant (and that person is around my age), my reaction is still "Oh! Is that a good thing?" Yes, my mouth does hurt from shoving my foot in there.

I wonder a bit if my personal timeline is that far off from what's expected of a woman my age (not that the expectations are going to influence my decisions, but really, is it so unheard of to not be taking those steps at 24?).

Guess I'll just have to brush up on my Aunt skills.

My Adult Acne Story

"When did I become one of those girls with dozens of beauty products, none of which are expendable? It used to be a touch of mascara, dab of Coppertone, zip, bam, boom, out the door." – Rory Gilmore

I had that exact thought yesterday after I got home from Shoppers Drug Mart. A lovely young woman helped me colour-match a new foundation because I'm actually too tan to wear the one I normally do. SHOCKING, I know. She also set me up with some sweet bronzer for my collar bone area because it was either that or, in her words "get more sun". Thanks?

She quickly redeemed any lost points by loading me up with free makeup swag. When I got home, I realized my makeup now explodes out of two kits – and that doesn't include what I have stashed under the sink. This is probably a normal state for many women; I, however, never wore makeup until basically my first year of university, because of my acne.

I've had severe bacterial/cystic acne for most of my life. Think of the worst zit you've ever had: bright red, giant and painful. That's what I had all the time. From the time I was ten until I graduated university, I never had a single clear skin day. Not one. I've gone through every type of treatment – birth control pills, any and every brand sold over the counter, prescription face washes and creams, wacky home remedies, antibiotics, Proactive, and finally, after putting it off for more than a year, a round of Accutane (Isotretinoin).

You know those low-quality commercials on during day time TV that advertise law firms looking for patients who have taken X drug and experienced Y side effects? Accutane is now featured in one. The scary list of potential side effects include kidney and liver damage (for which you're monitored with blood tests every two weeks while on the drug), increased risk of suicide and severe fetal defects – serious enough that by law, a woman must be on birth control pills to be prescribed this medication. I know what you're thinking – why didn't I take this sooner?

The side effects I did experience were severe drying of the skin, lips and eyes. I'm not talking about oh, my skin's a bit dry today. I mean I had a day moisturizer and a heavy duty night one, and if I missed applying either, my skin would start to slough off in hours. I had eye drops and lip balm with me at all times. I also couldn't spend much time outside, because you are at risk for severe sunburns. Isotretinoin basically changes your skin's make up, so I ended up a lot paler than when I started, and I don't tan as easily as I once did.

Rather than really clear up my acne, Accutane changed it - specifically, what parts of my face were the worst. Overall, it did get better, but it did not cure my skin condition. I am lucky enough that now, at 24, I seem to have found a combination that works for me (BECAUSE I KNOW YOU'RE INTERESTED):

·         Keracnyl by Ducray facewash

·         Active Moist moisturizer by Dermalogica

·         CoverFX water-based foundation (NaturalFX)

·         Skin prep scrub (about three times a week) by Dermalogica

Diet reduced in refined carbs/gluten/lactose

Everyone is different, and what works for me may not work for you. For some, a course of Accutane may be entirely worth it – and I can't really say for sure it wasn't for me. After all, who knows if my skin prior to Accutane would have reacted the same way as my post-Accutane skin to this regimen?

What I wish I had known back then is this:

·         Your diet matters

·         You need to use products faithfully for at least four weeks before seeing true results

·         Consistency matters – don't skip washing or moisturizing ever, if you can help it

·         The right make up can not only give the appearance of nicer skin, it can actually help maintain and create nicer skin.

·         Bad skin needs moisturizer too.

·         Stop wearing that stupid hat. You don't look as cool as you think you do.

But since I can't go back in time, I'll settle for being here, playing with my free, pretty make up.

The One About Coffee

I loves me some coffee. Home brew, cappuccino, latte, Americano, Coffee Crisp, these are all good things. Don't even get me started on chocolate covered coffee beans or dark chocolate Toblerone which isn't technically coffee but I'm pretty sure has 18 times the caffeine (there's 24 hours wide awake I won't get back – worth it).

My options in the morning are 1) brew some tasty Vanilla Hazelnut coffee at home 2) hit up Timmies 3) Second Cup 4) Starbucks 5) Gas station coffee and as a terrible, terrible last resort, 6) the coffee at my office.

The coffee at my office is bad. I've tried brewing it different, filling it with creamer, filling it with creamer and sugar, filling it with creamer and sugar and International Delight French Vanilla and nothing helps. While I am a big fan of coffee, my willingness to hit up the Java Stop in the closest Shell station proves that I'm not a coffee snob. My favourite coffee shop is one back in Kensington Market. It's actually a breakfast-type restaurant where I used to get a proper-sized (read: big ass) to-go cup with a proper-sized (think of a baby's head) made-on-the-premises muffin and head off to work. The owner was awesome and despite never knowing my name, always had my order ready to go before I even stepped in the shop.

*Sigh*

I haven't found anything like that here yet, although there are some great coffee shops out Jasper way. Bit rough to hit those on the way to work though.

ANYWHO.

This morning I left without brewing at home because I forgot (what? It was early) and I opted not to go to Tims despite what the voices in my head were telling me. When people talk about Tim Hortons the conversation usually goes like this:

"Tim Hortons coffee is terrible."

"Don't you go there everyday?"

"Yes. And if I miss a day I will cut you."

'Nuff said. So now I am stranded at work, coffee-less. I made myself a cup here and took one sip. Then it sat beside me, cream curdling and floating to the top. I just can't do it. This coffee makes me think there is no such thing as a loving God and if there is, he definitely drinks tea. *Lightbulb* I'm off to the tea cupboard (doesn't every office have a tea cupboard?). It's no coffee, but I'll take what I can get at this point. And that's where I find this.

Celestialseasonings.com
I don't know what Bengal tastes like, but I know I'm not going to find out.

You're welcome.

The "Reality" Of Beauty

The campaign for "real women" shows up quite often these days. This morning I read Mishelle's post on Curvy Girl Guide called "Real-Sized Style Icons". The post lists her top ten “Real-Sized” Fashion and Style Icons. I get what her point is here; she verbalizes herself quite neatly.

"After all, this is not a cookie-cutter world.  We are all different, and that should be embraced in our society, not shunned."

She then lists ten celebrities who all fit a particular body type. While these women are unquestionably beautiful, I have an issue with labeling them "real women". Real women come in all shapes and sizes, even slim.

Via WetPaint.com.

This is Kasia, the "fiercely real" competitor on America's Next Top Model. Can someone please tell me what makes her more "real" than the Cycle 15 winner, Ann?

Via Starcasm.net

The way we label each other matters. It's like condemning a woman for being "barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen". The point of gender equality wasn't to keep women from being stay at home moms. It was to empower them with the choice to do so or not. Telling women that real beauty is looking like Christina Hendricks is no different than saying they need to be a size zero to be attractive.

It is exciting to see more body types represented in the media as attractive, and I understand the urge to rally around that excitement and shout "see! I am beautiful!" I get it. But for those women who don't fit this facet of beautiful, we need to be better. We need to rise above any one definition, because no matter what size it is, it's inadequate. We need to stop pointing to any one type of body and identifying it as the standard of beauty. Instead, why can't we push a message of individual beauty? Who you are at your core and the choices you make are what make you attractive.

Real beauty for me.

Feelin' Fine

Yesterday was a pretty awesome day. I woke up feeling refreshed and energetic. I stopped to buy gas on the way to work and bought a lottery ticket for the hell of it. I won $15 (book the cruise!). It was sunny and lovely and warm out (uh, Edmonton warm, so about 10 degrees). Work went by quickly and without major incident. And my workout was AWESOME. It was a swimming day, and although I didn't set a PB for my race length (1km) due to some goggle malfunctions, I did set a PB for my overall distance (1.7km). Sweet! I felt strong and confident in my movements in the water.

I got home and made dinner, did laundry and cleaned up. I felt great. Apparently carbs = happy, even minimal carbs!

I find it amazing the disconnect that exists between our mind and body. We seem so reluctant to associate our moods and feelings with the way we treat our bodies in terms of food and exercise (and just overall). I wonder, what is it that creates this distance? Something I've been mulling over lately.

If all one of you is interested, you can see my workouts and times on my RunKeeper profile. Add me to your StreetTeam if you are on this site! http://runkeeper.com/user/E3Writing/profile

My Brain Is Mostly Mush

I have brain damage. Not in the "I don't eat lobster because it's alive when you kill it" kind of way, but in the grade three concussion with severe amnesia kind of way. I have problems with long and short-term memory. It's kind of like this:

http://purpderp.tumblr.com/post/2318542954/everyday-for-me

Because I love the third panel and experience it multiple times a day. And I can't find the Zits comic where Jeremy's head turns into an Etch-A-Sketch.

For example, I have spent the last three days trying to remember to take my earrings out my car's cupholder.

Three. Days.

I would remember before I got in my car, but etch-a-sketch my brain before I got out of the car at my destination. I would also remember about 30 minutes after I got into the house or office, but I didn't want to run outside to get them because I live in a slightly brisk area aka the second coldest place on earth.

When I finally managed to bring said earrings inside, I was standing in the office kitchen putting them in when a quiet voice (QV) spoke in my head.

QV: "You should really move over the counter more in case you drop the teeny tiny ball that holds your earring in place.

E3: "That's a good idea, but I won't do it. Who has that kind of time?"

*cue earring ball falling*

To save you searching for "earring ball" in Google images (SAFE SEARCH ON!!! SAFE SEARCH ON!!!), it looks like this:

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/11T23D%2B9cSL._SL500_AA300_.jpg

The earring I keep in my rook piercing (in my EAR).

One of those balls is about the size of a larger pinhead. Point is, it's small. And very hard to find once dropped. And I didn't just manage to drop it anywhere. I dropped it in the closed dishwasher.

Obviously my addled brain didn't care much for that earring. Anyone have a spare?